When someone we love dies, it changes everything instantly. It doesn’t matter whether the death was expected – due, perhaps, to a long term illness – or whether it came as a surprise; the fact that they are gone is still something that people find difficult to cope with.
It will take a little while to get used to the death of someone close to you. However, in order to carry on with your life, you will need to learn how to cope with the pain. It won’t be easy, but there are things you can do that will help not just you but others who are experiencing the same loss.
Reduce Your Stress
When you are grieving, you will find that everything feels a lot more stressful than it might normally do. Your body and mind are on high alert, and anything can make you worry. So it’s a good idea to try to reduce as many stresses in your life as possible.
Take time off work, to begin with. Although the idea of keeping busy might be a useful one, it will often serve to make you more stressed and potentially unwell. You need time to process what has happened, and trying to hide from it won’t help at all.
It is not just the stress of normal life that can begin to affect you. Other stresses include having to arrange and pay for a funeral when you are trying to come to terms with the loss at the same time. Your loved one might have a funeral plan in place, but if not and finances aren’t in place to pay, you can save yourself a lot of stress by applying for a CashLady loan.
Whatever is it that is causing you more stress than is necessary, remove it from your life at least while you are coming to terms with your loss. Supplements such as CBD oil have also been shown to help address the physiological symptoms of stress and anxiety. You can read more about that here.
Look After Yourself
The more you take care of yourself, the better you will be able to cope with what has happened. It might be the furthest thing from your mind, but sitting down to a proper, balanced meal is much better for you than takeout or skipping dinner altogether, for example. For some, the appetite is completely lost when they are grieving, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t eat – try just a little and build up if it’s really a problem.
Sleeping is something else that is hugely important. If you don’t sleep, you will become ill, and that increases your stress levels and makes it harder for you to deal with what is happening around you. It will, of course, be hard to sleep because when everything is quiet you will start to think of the person who died, but by having a warm bath before bed, drinking a hot, milky drink, and even using essential oils on your pillow, you can help yourself to drift off. If you really can’t sleep, leave the radio on in your bedroom so that there is noise. As a last resort, leave the TV on or a laptop playing videos. This isn’t ideal because the blue light emitting from these screens can cause sleeplessness, but if nothing else is working, then you might try and see if it helps because sleep is so important.
It’s not fun to cry, and it’s especially not fun to cry in front of other people, but it’s a vital part of the healing process after the death of a loved one. It’s an entirely natural reaction, and it actually helps to relieve stress too. So if you feel like you want to cry, even if you can’t seem to at first and the feeling hits you days, weeks, or even months after the event itself, do it.
Don’t concern yourself with who is around you or what they will think. If you need to cry, then you must allow yourself to. If you keep your grief and tears locked up inside you, it isn’t healthy. Your body needs some kind of release to stop the stress from becoming overwhelming.
Something important to note about crying is that you should never try to stop someone from doing so, even if you are trying to help them feel better. If they are crying, there is a reason for it and, quite often, a need for it. So if you are helping someone else through the grieving process, let them cry when they want to.
Talk To Someone
There is such a thing as grief counseling, and more can be found out about this at Therapy Tribe. It can make a big difference in the lives of those who have experienced a family bereavement. Grief is such a powerful emotion that it can become all-encompassing, and by talking to someone, you can let out those feelings and feel lighter and happier for it.
Although there are professional counselors and therapists who are there to specifically help people who are grieving, you don’t have to seek professional help if you don’t want to. You can talk to a friend about what has happened, or even use online chats and forums if you would prefer to find a stranger who has been through a similar experience to you. Remember, you are not looking for answers, especially if you are choosing not to speak to a professional; you are simply looking for a sounding board.
Get The Facts
In some cases, the death of a loved one might not be clear, and this means that you aren’t able to start working through it because you don’t have all the facts about what happened. Although it won’t change anything, getting those facts and understanding more about what happened can help with the grieving process.
Bear in mind, though, that some deaths will always be unexplained. That doesn’t necessarily mean that anything suspicious caused them, but it does mean that there was no reason behind the death. It could be that it was just something that happened. If this is the case for your family, this is something you will need to reconcile yourself to, and it may take some time.